PS 3505 
.07755 
S3 
1919 
Copy 1 



The Saving of 

Pug Halley 

REV. P. J. £ARROLL, C. S. C. 



Saving of Pug Halley 



A BOYS' PLAY 
IN THREE ACTS 



CHARACTERS 



Wilfred Gilman, renamed "Sissie" 

Jimmie Dolan 

Eddie Robinson 

Smooth Spillman 

Roy Feehan 

Herb Mayhood 

Bobbie Brown 

Don Anderson 

Joe Horan 

Rex Magee 

Bob Wilson 

Ben Allen 

Ray Allen 

Eck Donlan 

Sleepy-Hollow* * Davis 
"Bang" McCann 
"Pug" Halley 

Farmer Hodge 

Hodge Jr., his son, called "Farmer' 

Dr. Bonner 



P5 3,5^5 



COPYRIGHTED, 1913 
Published by 

REV. P. J. CARROLL, C. S. C. 

226 N. Hill Street 
SOUTH BEND. INDIANA 



Six copies must be purchased if play is produced. 






-JftN 291919 



The Saving of Pug Halley 



ACT I. 



Seventh Grade Class Room on a wet morning before 
School begins. Boys seated at their desks when curtain 
goes up. Much of the conversation that follows is in loud 
whispers. Silence for some moments after the curtain 
goes up. 

DOLAN (Looking out window.) Gee whis! If it wasn't 

rainin' we wouldn't be in here waitin' for class to 

begin. 
ROBINSON Das what I say. 
FEEHAN Me too. 

SPILLMAN You kids better keep still an' let me study. 
SEVERAL BOYS (Ironically.) O say! 
MAYHOOD Mister Studious Smooth Spillman! 
SPILLMAN Well, I guess a guy can study, can't he? 
BROWN Sh-h-h! (Pointing to door in warning.) 
HORAN Say, Rex, ain't this a funny sentence to parse: 

'The boy stood near his mother dear?' Now — what's 

boy? 
MAGEE (In quick, jerky manner.) Boy's noun, common. 

third. 
HORAN (Scratching his head doubtfully.) Boy, common? 

Don't think so. 
MAGEE Sure it's common. 
HORAN Well, I'm a boy an' I ain't common. 
WILSON Huh, ho, some joke I must say! 

("Pug" Halley throws piece of chalk and hits Eck 
Donlan.) 
DONLAN Now quit that, Pug, or there'll be trouble, do 

you liear? 
HALLEY Yeh, I hear but I ain't goin' to quit, see! 

(Throws another piece.) 
DONLAN Pug! 
HALLEY Bet shu dime you won't say that after school. 

I'd bat you one. 
BEN ALLEN You ain't supposed to light, Halley; you 

know you ain't. 
HALLEY Aw, I'll biff you too; bill you all over the lot. 
BEN ALLEN Yes, you will! 
HALLEY (Rising.) Yes, I will. 
DONLAN Just set down, Mister. This ain't a priie ring. 

halley (Remains standing.) Guess ru sit down when i 

feel like it. 
DONLAN All right, just keep on standin'. Twill help 

to givo your mouth a rest, (Hoys Laugh, llalloy 

sits down.) 



The Saving of Pug Halley 



ANDERSON Say, do you guys know that if you keep on 
talkin' we'll all get pinched? See if we don't! 

HALLEY Fat chance of me gettin' pinched! 

ANDERSON An* why wouldn't you get pinched I'd like to 
know? 

HALLEY Wouldn't stick for it. Like to see myself stay in 
after school! 

RAY ALLEN Say, Halley, of all the blow-hards I ever 
heard, you're the biggest. Honest, to hear you talk, 
you'd think you were the whole band. 

DAVIS Naw, he ain't the whole band. He's only the big 
drum. 

PEEHAN Gee that sounds funny; but I'd like to know 
why he's the big drum. 

DAVIS Why? Gee, any kid should know that. 'Cause 
his head's empty an' full o' noise. (Boys laugh.) 

HALLEY (Jumping up.) Look here kid, if you talk like 
that 'bout me, I'll punch your head. 

DAVIS G'wan, punch a hole in a doughnut. (Boys laugh.) 

HALLEY (Excitedly.) I'll lick you all over the room, do 
you hear? 

DAVIS Naw, you won't. Here's an envelope (Hands en- 
velope toward Halley.) Lick that. (Boys laugh.) 

HALLEY (Sitting down slowly.) You kids can keep on 
your laughin', but I'll get that guy after school. See 
if I don't! 

PEEHAN, (Looking up from an English book.) Say, but 
this is funny. Listen, kids. (Reading) 'The word 
barbaric means an object of art or dress that is 
characteristic of barbarians. Barbarian means one 
who is uncivilized or cruelly harsh.' So, then, Pug, 
ain't a barbaric but a barbarian. 

HALLEY (Jumping up.) I'll get shu, Peehan, after 
school! 

PEEHAN What fur? 'Cause I said you're a barbarian? 

HALLEY (Sitting down.) Never mind, I'll get shu. 

PEEHAN Aw, you couldn't get nothin'. You don't know 
enough to get sick (Boys laugh.) 

DOLAN How many o' youse kids goin' out to Hodge's to- 
morrow for the picnic? 

ROBINSON I'm goin'. (Dolan begins to write down 
names.) 

SPILLMAN Me too. 

FEEHAN I'll be there all right. 

MAYHOOD Put me down. 

BROWN Me likewise, 

ANDERSON Write down the name of Mr. Don Anderson. 

SEVERAL BOYS Mr. Don Anderson! O sayf 

HORAN Write Joe Horan. 

MAGEE An' Rex Magee, 



The Saving of Pug Halley 



BOB WILSON Put us all down, we're all going'. 
DOLAN All right. (Writes.) Now don't any o' you guys 

miss. 
HODGE JR. An' I want to warn youse guys not to fool 

with Ma's chickens an' don't let Pa see you hangin' 

round the barn. 
RAY ALLEN Don't you fear, Farmer, we'll be good. See 

if we won't! 
HODGE JR. My Pa don't think so. 
RAY ALLEN Never mind, Hodge, we're goin' to be just 

like we was girls, we'll be so good. 
HODGE JR. Yeh, but Pa don't think so. 
RAY ALLEN (Standing up and with mock solemnity.) 

Never mind your Pa. Just attend to me. 
HODGE JR. Ha, ha, wait 'till my Pa hears that! 
MAYHOOD (Jumping up suddenly.) Say, Brownie, what 

did shu do with my knife? 
BROWN What knife? 

MAYHOOD What knife! Didn't I just tell you. My knife. 
BROWN I ain't got your knife. 
MAYHOOD Yes, you have too. I gave it to you yesterday 

to cut the dog collar. 
BROWN You never gave me no knife. 
MAYHOOD Ho-ho! Yes I did too. 
BROWN No you didn't. Did he, Don? 
ANDERSON Yes he did, Brownie. I saw him. 
BROWN (To Davis.) Say, Sleepy, didn't I give you May- 
hood's knife? 
DAVIS (Slowly.) Naw, you didn't. 
BROWN Yes, I did too. 
DAVIS Naw, Siree, never did. 
BROWN Well, I guess I did when you was puttin' a hole 

in the nigger shooter. 
DAVIS No, Sir. Did he Eck? 
DONLAN Yeh, he did, Sleepy. I seen him. 
DAVIS (Looking over the class for some time.) Joe, 

what did you do with that knife? 
HORAN (Looking up suddenly.) You never gave me no 

knife. 
DAVIS Yes, I did. 

HORAN Nix, — not at all, — never. Did he, Rex? 
MAGEE Sure thing, Joe. You borrowed it to open a can 

o' sardines. 
HORAN (Looking over boys.) Come, Bob, give mo that 

knife. 
WILSON What shu talkin' 'bout? 
HORAN Come on, come on! Hand over! 
WILSON Hand over what? 
HORAN You know what. Hand over that knife. 



6 The Saving of Pug Halley 

WILSON You didn't give me any knife. 

HORAN Come on, come on. 

WILSON No, honest. Did he, Ben? 

BEN ALLEN Huh, huh. 

WILSON Say, kid, where do you get that? 

BEN ALLEN Honest! He gave it to you when you wanted 
to cut the cover o' the baseball. 

WILSON Didn't I give it to you, Ray? 

RAY ALLEN Yeh, an' I gave it to Bang to cut a piece o' 
tin to fix the Ford. 

McCANN An'-an'-I gave it to you, Parmer. 

HODGE JR. Yeh, an' M-losted it. 

McCANN O you grammar! 

DOLAN Farmer, you'll have to make restitution, das all. 

HODJE JR. Restitution? What's dat? 

DOLAN The coin — das what. You got to hand six bits to 
Mayhood for his knife. 

HODGE JR. Ain't got no six bits. 

DOLAN You got to make restitution, das all. The Cat- 
echism says so. 

MAYHOOD Yeh, in money or money's worth. 

DOLAN Huh, huh, money or money's worth. 

HODGE JR. What d' you mean by money's worth? 

DOLAN Well, now supposin'-er-a-supposin' you stole ten 
dollars from a guy. Then supposin' you didn't have 
no money to pay it back. Then you'd pay it back in 
money's worth. D' you see? 

HODGE JR. Naw, I don't see nothin'. You say if I can't 
pay the ten dollars back, I must pay it in money's 
worth. How can I when I don't know what money's 
worth is. 

ROBINSON Let me tell you. He (pointing to Dolan) 
don't know nothin'. You see if you steal ten dollars 
from a guy an' you can't pay it, you can give him ten 
dollars worth o' apples. An' so, if you give every 
kid here a pocket o' apples from your Dad's orchard, 
when we're out at the picnic, 'twill pay for the knife. 

HODGE JR. (Scratching his head.) That's a whole lot 
to give. An' I don't know as Pa would let me have 
'em. 

ROBINSON (Coaxing.) Now look here, Hodge, you're a 
good kid. I like you, he (pointing out other boys 
individually) likes you an' so does he, an' he, an' 
he — et cetera an' so forth. 

SPILLMAN Das right, Hodgie. Don't be a guy that never 
helps another guy. Apples will grow again. We're 
all friends here. E pluribus unum. We are all your 
neighbors an' you must love us. Just say to us: 
"Fellas, when you come to-morrow youse can have 
all the apples you want to." 



The Saving of Pug Halley 7 

HODGE JR. (Slowly.) Yeh, but what will my Pa say? 

FEEHAN Your Pa won't care. He'll be just glad to see 
us. He'll say: "You're mighty good boys. Go right 
into the orchard an' help yourselves." 

HODGE JR. Yes he will! You guys don't know Pa. 

FEEHAN You mustn't say 'guys,' Hodgie. You must say 
"Fellow Students." 

MAYHOOD Yeh, or "Beloved Friends." 

BROWN Or "Dear Companions." 

ANDERSON Or "Fond Associates." 

HORAN Naw, you must say "Fellow Citizens." 

MAGEE Never mind, Hodgie. Say what you like, only 
let's get the apples. 

HODGE JR. Well % youse ken ask my Pa, an' if Pa says 
you ken, you ken. 

SEVERAL BOYS Das talkin' Hodgie. You're a brick! 

BEN ALLEN Say, if you kids don't shut up the Sister 
will be here in a minute. 

RAY ALLEN Yeh, das what I say. (A knock on the door.) 

SEVERAL BOYS S-h! 

MAGEE Somebody outside! 

WILSON I'll bet it's Sister. 

MAGEE Naw, Sister wouldn't knock. 
(Knock again.) 

DOLAN Gosh, who is it? 

ROBINSON (To Ben Allen.) Open the door, Ben. 

BEN ALLEN (Aloud.) Come in! 

RAY ALLEN (Louder.) Come in! 

DONLAN (Louder still.) Come in! 

(Door opens. Enter Gillman. Well dressed, neat ap- 
pearing, rather girlish. Stands inside door for a few 
moments.) 

McCANN (Aside to Brown.) Who's the guy? 

BROWN (Aside.) Don't know. Swell ain't he? 

McCANN (Aside.) Bet he never had a fight, his hands are 
so clean. 

BROWN (Aside.) An' I bet shu a dime his shoos are so 
shiney that every day is Sunday for him. 

GILLMAN (Aloud.) Pardon me, but is this St. Philip's 
School? 

ANDERSON Huh, huh. 

GILLMAN And is this the seventh grade room? 

ANDERSON Huh, huh. 

(Silence for some moments, Gillman remain! stand- 
ing.) 

HALLEY Say, kid, don't you want the girls' room? (Some 
of the boys laugh secretly.) 

GILLMAN No, I was told to go to the hoys' room. 

HALLEY (Bluntly.) What's your name? 



8 The Saving of Pug Halley 

GILLMAN Gillman — Wilfred Gillman. 

HALLEY say! (Boys laugh secretly aside.) Wilfred 

Gillman, la! 
MAYHOOD (Aside.) O Wilfred, you beauty! 
WILSON (Aside.) O Wilfred, you sugar plum! 
HALLEY (Aside.) Naw, fellas, that's not his name. Let's 

call him "Sissie." 
MAYHOOD (Aside.) Yeh, fellas, that's fine. Let's call 

call him "Sissie" Gillman. 

HALLEY (Aside.) Huh, huh. An* we'll 'nitiate him this 
evenin'. 

WILSON (Aside.) Huh, huh; das fine — 'nitiate him. 

MAYHOOD Yeh, lots of excitement. 

HALLEY (Aside.) You bet. I'll start it by punchin' his 
head. 

DONLAN (Stands up and faces boys.) Say, fellas, I think 
it's a low trick to treat a new kid this way. 

HALLEY Aw, what's it to you? 

WILSON Yeh, das what I say. 

DONLAN It's a whole lot to me. It's so much to me that 
I ain't goin' to stick for it (Walks nearer to Halley, 
pointing finger at him.) You Pug, some day when I 
get real mad I'll punch your head off. (Turns toward 
Gillman as Halley is about to speak.) Wilfred, 
we're mighty glad you're comin' to our school, an' 
we hope you'll like it. Sit down here till the teacher 
comes. (Shows Gillman a seat.) 

MAYHOOD (Ironically.) Gosh, but isn't Donlan a big guy! 

WILSON O yeh, he's some hero, he is! 

HALLEY Yeh, Archduke Donlan, you're a wonder! But 
I'll make you more wonderful first time I get you 
out. An' I'll spoil Sissie's new clothes, too, see if 
I don't! 

DONLAN Listen, Pug, I ain't goin' to brag. But the first 
time you see me outside, where the teachers won't 
stop us, come around. I won't run. I ain't afraid 
o' you. Never was afraid o' you. 

HALLEY Don't shu talk to me like that. 

DONLAN Well, don't shu call the new kid names 

HALLEY Yes, I will. He's nothin' but a girlie face. 

DONLAN You're nothin' but a flat nose, a-a turnip head! 

HALLEY I'll show you. (Makes rush at Donlan and 
strikes him with closed fist on the breast.) Take 
that! (The class gong rings. The boys bend their 
heads over their books. Halley rushes to his desk and 
sits down. Class room door opens.) 

DONLAN (Aside so all the boys hear.) First round, Pug. 
The gong saved you! (Curtain.) 



The Saving of Pug Halley 



ACT II. 

Scene 1. 

Place — A park just outside of the town. 
Time — An autumn evening after school. 
Rustic benches under trees; rustic chairs. 
Halley, Wilson, Mayhood, Ben Allen, Jimmie Dolan 
are lying on grass or lounging on benches. 

HALLEY Say, fellas, it's goin' to work fine. I saw Sissie 
when I was goin' home an' he fell for everything. 

WILSON How're you goin' to work it, Hal? You know if 
anything goes wrong the 'nitiation is all up. 

HALLEY Never mind, I got it all fixed up. 

MAYHOOD What shu done? Tell us. 

HALLEY (Swaggering.) What I done? Say, boy, I fixed 
it up just like a play. I met Sissie on my way home 
from school an' I pretended I was the best friend he 
got, an' I said to him: 'Say, kid, we're goin' to have 
a potato roast over in the Park after supper. Come 
on over, an' get in with the bunch.' 'I don't know 
the boys yet,' he says. 'O never mind that,' says I, 
'just come along an' meet the fellas.' Then he said 
— the Sissie! — 'Wait 'till I ask my mother.' An' he 
went in an' asked his ma. Then when he came out 
he said, "All right. Where'll I meet shu?' 'Down 
at the park near the fir-grove at half past seven,' I 
says. Now, then, Kids, he'll be here in twenty min- 
utes, so we'd better scatter 'till he comes. 

WILSON Yeh, but what's the plan? 

HALLEY The plan's as simple as duckin' your head under 
water. When the guy gets here us five will be 
masked. We'll surround him, an' tie him with this 
rope (shows rope). 'Twill be dark, nobody will be 
'round. Then we'll skip an' leave him tied 'till 
somebody finds him. 

WILSON Pretty nifty, I must say, Hal, old kid. 

MAYHOOD Yeh, I must hand it to you, Halley, for workin' 
up the 'nitiation of a guy. 

HALLEY We'll have one swell tirne with Mr. Sissie. 

MAYHOOD Yeh, we'll make him .holler all right. 

WILSON An' he'll bawl (Imitating). 'Please, Misters. 
don't!' 

HALLEY An' I'll bet shu a dime he'll call for his ma. 

BEN ALLEN (Standing up.) Look hero fellas, this thing 
don't strike me as square. Don't look right to me. 
I ain't goin' to stick for it. 

HALLEY You ain't! Well, why did you promise to come 
here if you ain't goin' to stick for it? 

BEN ALLEN Well, I thought you were goin' to play a 
decent trick, not a low trick Like tyin' a kid with a 
rope. 

DOLAN (Standing up.) Yeh, das what 1 say too. Tyin' 
a kid for a whole night ain't no decent trick. 



10 The Saving of Pug Halley 

BEN ALLEN A kid ain't a wild beast. 

DOLAN An' tain't right to treat any kid that way; 'special- 
ly seem' he's a new kid. 

HALLEY (Rising.) Well, if you kids don't like it, youse 
know what youse ken do. 

BEN ALLEN Yeh, but tain't right an' I ain't goin' to stick 
for it. 

HALLEY Well, if youse don't want to stick for it, get out 
o' here. We don't want shu. Guess we ken get 
Sissie without youse guys. 

BEN ALLEN All right; let's go, Dolan. Just the same it's 
a low, beastly trick. 

DOLAN An' you kids should be ashamed o' yourselves! 

HALLEY You two just get out o' here if youse don't want 
your noses flattened. We're goin' to tie up the new 
guy — Mr. White-face, Mr. Swell-clothes — just to 
show him who's running' the bunch. An' you kids 
better shut your mouth 'bout it too. 

BEN ALLEN I ain't so sure 'bout that. 

HALLEY You'd better, or I'll get you too. 

BEN ALLEN Now look here, Halley. You think you got 
it on every kid 'bout the place. You bully the fellas 
so they stick for everything you do. Now listen, you 
ain't goin' to bully me. I ain't goin to stick for such 
a low-down, measely trick as that. 

DOLAN Nor, I either. (Ben Allen and Dolan walk out 
slowly.) 

HALLEY (Shouting.) Quitters! 

WILSON (Throwing a piece of sod.) Babies! 

MAYHOOD (Shouting.) Sissies! 

HALLEY (Shouting.) Pikers! 

WILSON and MAYHOOD (Shouting.) You're yellow! 

(Curtain 

Scene II. 

Place — Near entrance of Park. 

Donlan carrying a package meets Gillman, 
DONLAN (Heartily.) Hello, Gillman, old kid, howdy? 
GILLMAN Just fine, thank you. Could you tell me where's 

the pine grove, Eck? 
DONLAN (Pointing.) Why its back there in the park, 

Gillman. Just follow the road. What's goin' on? 
GILLMAN Why, the boys are going to have a potato roast, 

and they asked me along. 
DONLAN A potato roast! Didn't hear a thing about it. 

Who told shu? 
GILLMAN Why, I think his name's Halley. You see I 

don't know the boys so well yet, but I'm pretty 

sure that's it. 
DONLAN Yeh, dat's the guy, Pug Halley. An' did he 

ask you to meet him at the pine grove? 



The Saving of Pug Halley 11 

GILLMAN Yes, in the park — just outside the grove. 

DONLAN Das strange. 

GILLMAN Why? 

DONLAN Well, 'cause Halley ain't the kind o' kid to do 
nice things for a guy. The only kind o' roasts I ever 
saw Pug give was a kid roast. 

GILLMAN A kid roast? 

DONLAN Sure. He's been roastin' the kids roun' here 
ever since I knew him. So you're goin' eh? 

GILLMAN Yes, I asked my mother, and she said I might, 
but I'll be back early. 

DONLAN Well, I hope you have a good time. (Reflects 
for a few moments. Gillman is about to go.) Say, 
(Suddenly) Gillman, I always forget to ask you 
where you come from? 

GILLMAN (Turning.) I? Why I come from a small 

town in New York. My father was a steam-boat 
captain and made regular trips along the Hudson. 
A year ago he was killed in an explosion and then my 
mother came out west. She liked the place so much 
that we settled down here. That's why I began 
school here last Monday. 

DONLAN An' arn't you lonesome for your own town? 

GILLMAN O yes, but then my sisters help to make it 
pleasant. 

DONLAN O, so you've sisters too? 

GILLMANO yes, I have three sisters. Mary — she's twenty 
— Anna and Catherine. 

DONLAN Three sisters. Gee whis, that's strange! An' I 
ain't got one. I've only three brothers. Bill, Ed 
and Joe. You see that's why I'm so rough, an' talk 
slang an' ain't got no manners. 

GILLMAN I don't think you're rough. I think you're a 
real boy. You can stand up for yourself and take 
your own part. You see that's the trouble with me, 
I can't. I was sick 'till I was ten years, and I've 
never been out with boys, so I expect I'm a kind of 
a Sissie. 

DONLAN No, you ain't by a long shot. Lots o' kids think 
if a guy speaks right an' acts kind o* nice he's a Sis- 
sie, but that ain't so. I wish we all were as clean an' 
as well-dressed an' as polite as you. I wish I had 
one grown sister. She'd make me brush my teeth, 
an' dust my coat, an' shine my shoes, an' wash my 
hands, so there wouldn't be any dirt under my finger 
nails. Gillman, you're all right. Keep your eyes 
open an' don't let any guy slip anything over on you. 
An' say, don't let Halley bully you. Do you hear 
don't let him bully you. 

GILLMAN O I'll let him alone. I don't want any trouble 
with him. 

DONLAN (Forcibly.) You let him alone, if he Id's you 
alone. Do you hear — if he lets you alone. If he 



12 The Saving of Pug Halley 

don't, just biff him one right between the two eyes 
an' make him look silly. An' if you don't care to, 
let me know an' I'll do it for you. I owe him a 
beatin' anyhow. Well, so long, Kid. Follow the 
road straight on, an' be sure to let me know when 
you want some one to lick Halley. (Exit Gillman.) 
He's one good kid an' I'm goin' to treat him right. 
(Begins some song as he goes out. He is met by 
Ben Allen and Dolan.) Hello, fellas! Goin' to the 
potato roast, eh? 

DOLAN Did shu hear about it, too? 

DONLAN Yeh, Gillman said he was goin'. 

BEN ALLEN Did you see Gillman? 

DONLAN Yeh, he just went out that way a couple o' min- 
utes ago. You must 'a just missed him. 

BEN ALLEN Say, Donlan, you're the very guy we want. 
Pug's up to one o' his low tricks an' you got to help 
us stop it. 

DONLAN What trick? 

BEN ALLEN Why it's a trick he's goin' to play on Gill- 
man. He's got Mayhood an' Wilson with him down 
at the grove. Pug told Gillman that the fellas would 
all be there for a potato roast an' he should come 
on down. When he gets there, three of 'em are goin' 
to tie up Gillman with a rope and leave him alone 
for the night. 

DONLAN How do you guys know? 

DOLAN Why we was down there with 'em when they made 
the plan. We were in it 'till we found out what 
they were goin' to do an' then we wouldn't stick 
for it. 

DONLAN Gee, das pretty bad. What are we goin' to do? 

DOLAN Let's follow Gillman an' fight 'em off — three 
again' three. 

DONLAN Naw, das no good. 

BEN ALLEN Well, let's go an' turn Gillman loose after 
they've gone away. 

DONLAN Naw, I don't like that. (Takes attitude of think- 
ing. After some moments.) Listen, Kids, I've got 
somethin' we'll try on 'em. 

BEN ALLEN What is it? 

DONLAN Never mind, now, Ben. The both o' you hurry 
along with me an' I'll tell you my scheme. 

Scene III. 

Place — As in opening of Act II. 

Halley, Mayhood and Wilson discovered. 

MAYHOOD Say, Hal, don't shu think it's time Sissie was 
showin' up? 

HALLEY Don't shu worry. He'll be here all right. Have 
you got the rope, Wilson? 



The Saving of Pug Halley 13 

WILSON (Showing a rope.) Sure thing! 

HALLEY Now listen, fellas. Before Sissie shows up, let's 
put these masks on and get behind here; (points out 
place of hiding) then when he gets here, let's jump 
on him quick an' tie him up for keeps. Get me? 

WILSON Sure thing! Halley, you're a peach. 

MAYHOOD Yeh, Halley, you're the kid with the bean. 

HALLEY An' fellas, when we've turned the trick let's 
beat it. Do you hear? Let's beat it— out this way. 
(Pointing.) 

WILSON You go ahead an' we'll follow. 

HALLEY (Looking out.) Sh, fellas, here he comes. Let's 
put on the masks. (Put on the masks.) Get in 
here quick! 

(The three disappear. The stage is vacant for some 
moments. Gillman enters.) 

GILLMAN (Looking about him.) This seems like the 
place. Strange that the boys arn't here. (Halley, 
Mayhood and Wilson jump out from their hiding, 
disguised, and leap on Gillman. There is a struggle. 
Gillman is overpowered and tied. The three boys 
then turn to make their escape and are confronted by 
figure dressed up as ghost.) 

WILSON (Showing signs of fright.) What is it? 

MAYHOOD Let's go the other way. 

HALLEY Yeh, let's get out o' here. 

GHOST (In deep, solemn voice.) Stop! (They stop and 
look at ghost.) Kneel! (They kneel.) Who are 
ye that do such vile deeds in the deep woods and in 
the silent night? (Pointing toward Gillman.) Re- 
move your prisoner and bring him here. (The boys 
free Gillman and bring him before Ghost.) Remove 
your masks. (They remove masks.) Kneel! (They 
kneel.) For this vile deed which you have done (to 
Halley) take this! (Slaps him sharply across the 
face.) Take this! (to Mayhood.) Take this! (to 
Wilson.) And now begone, begone, begone and nev- 
er let me see you more. Ding, dong, bell. And nev- 
er let me see you more. (Halley, Mayhood and Wil- 
son go out showing signs of great fear.) And, (ad- 
dresses Gillman) as for you, we now restore to you 
your freedom evermore. (Takes Gillman's hand ami 
shows him off the stage. Ben Allen and Dolan rush 
in laughing. Ghost returns and removes disguise, 
revealing Donlan.) 

BEN ALLEN (Pointing to Donlan.) O you ghost of Ham- 
let! 

DOLAN Can you beat it? (Laughingly pantomiming Don- 
lan striking the boys.) 
WHIF! BING! WAOW! 

(Curtain) 



14 The Saving of Pug Halley 

ACT in. 

Scene — Hodge's Farm. 

Time — Late in the afternoon. 

Halley, Wilson and Mayhood discovered in the act 
of crossing the stage. 
HALLEY Say, fellas, I was sure scared. 
WILSON An' O, Hal, I hope we'll never see another ghost. 
MAYHOOD Well, I'm sure I'll never tie up another kid as 

long as I live. 
WILSON I neither; wasn't it terrible? 
HALLEY Listen, I didn't sleep all night, an' I sweated 

'till I looked like I was in the river. 
MAYHOOD Ma, when she saw me run home, says: 'What's 

the matter?' An honest I couldn't find the strength 

to tell her a thing. An' say — that slap I got on the 

face stings yet. 
WILSON It's the truth. The kids are all talkin' 'bout it. 
HALLEY Well, it taught me a lesson anyhow, fellas. I'm 

goin' to say my prayers an' keep in the state o' grace, 

das what I'm goin' to do. 
MAYHOOD Yeh, an' I'm goin' to carry a blessed candle 

in my pocket. 
WILSON Huh, huh, an' I'm goin' to fill a little bottle o' 

holy water an' have it with me. 
HALLEY Ma told me lots o' times that the devil was in 

me, an' may be das why we saw the ghost. 
MAYHOOD Well, if the devil is in you you'll have to be 

blessed, das all. 
WILSON Yeh, you'll have to be blessed, so the devils will 

all go out like little pigs, same as it says in the 

Bible history. 
HALLEY I'll tell you what I'll do, kids. I'll ask Father 

Conway when I go to Confession, an' he can tell me 

if there's little devils in me. 

MAYHOOD Yeh, das the best way. Let's try to forget it, 
kids, an' go down to the river to fish. Hodge's boat 
is anchored near the marsh. 

HALLEY Das a good idea. We'll get away from the rest 
o' the guys so they won't be asking us questions 
about the ghost. (They walk out slowly.) An' say, 
kids, I'll never do another mean trick in my life. An' 
if I don't, may be the little devils will go out o' me 
by themselves. (The three boys go out.) 
(Enter Dolan, Robinson, Spillman, Feehan, Brown, 
Anderson, Magee, Ben Allen, Davis, Ray Allen, 
McCann, Hodge Jr. They lie or sit on the grass.) 

ROBINSON Say Hodgie, how many's each kid allowed? 

HODGE JR. 'Spect 'bout ten would be all right. 

DOLAN Ten! Have a feelin', Hodgie. Do you 'spose we 
walked all the way out here for ten apples. (Count- 
ing boys.) One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, 
eight, nine, ten, eleven. (Donlan enters.) 



The Saving of Pug Halley 15 

DONLAN Twelve. 

SPILLMAN An' Wilson thirteen. 

FEEHAN An' Mayhood fourteen. 

RAY ALLEN An' Pug fifteen. 

HODGE JR. An' ten times fifteen's a hundred an* fifty. 

BROWN Gee whiz one kid could eat 'em all. 

MAGEE Yeh, das what I say. Loosen up, Farmer. 

BEN ALLEN It's the truth, Hodgie. Come on over an* 

be a sport. 
RAY ALLEN Sure thing, Agricola — the Latin for farmer 

— come down the river an' don't be a tight wad. 
ANDERSON The very truth, Hodgos, — the Greek for 

Hodge. Expand like the oak and don't be a weasel. 
DAVIS Naw, don't be a ground-hog, Farmer. We're all 

your friends. Aren't we, fellas? 
SEVERAL Sure, Mike! 
HODGE JR. Well, seein' as youse kids don't like it, I'll 

ask Pa myself. 
McCANN Yeh, an' tell your Pa how we're all good friends 

o' yours % an' bright boys, an' love our parents an' 

do our home-work an' keep the Commandments. 
HODGE JR. Haw! haw! If I'd say that to my Pa he'd 

know I was lyin', an' he'd kick me out. (Exit.) 
DONLAN Say, kids, Where's Pug? Ain't seen him 'round. 

DOLAN He an' Mayhood, an Wilson an' Joe Horan went 
ahead of us an' are gone down to the river to fish. 
Don't you worry, they'll be here by the time Hodgie 
brings the apples. 

ROBINSON An' Gillman, Where's he? 

DONLAN He's back there in the woods lookin' for some 
kind o' vine for his sister's garden. 

SPILLMAN That reminds me! Did any o' you kids hear 
'bout the ghost? 

SEVERAL BOYS What ghost? 

SPILLMAN Why, the ghost that beat up on Pug last night. 

FEEHAN G'wan! 

SPILLMAN Straight goods! Pug an' a couple other guys 
— Mayhood an' Wilson, I think — was goin' to 'nitiate 
Sissie an' have a little fun. They got him to go to 
the pine grove in the Park an' tied him with a rope 
an' was goin to leave him there all night. Just 
when then was 'bout to go they seen the ghost. 

SEVERAL BOYS Yeh? 

SPILLMAN Yeh, sure. The ghost, he was all dressed in 
white an' he appeared to them an' he called the three 
kids an' told 'em to come on over. An' they were 
all atremblin' when they went over. Then the ghost 
he said — 'Remove your prisoner' or somethin' an* 
they did. They he biffed 'em several times an' 
kicked 'em all over the lot. 



16 The Saving of Pug Halley 

BROWN Naw, I heard it different. He didn't kick 'em all 

over the lot. He just said — 'Begone' or somethin' 

an' gave em a lickin'. 
FEEHAN Don't I know better? Didn't some o' the kids 

tell me. Ain't it the truth, Donlan? 
DONLAN Gosh, how do I know? Better ask the ghost. 
ANDERSON An' did they free Gillman? 
BROWN Yeu bet they did an' mighty quick too. 
MAGEE Well I hope the ghost gave Pug a good lickin'. 
BROWN You bet he did. Pug ran home bawlin' all the 

way. He's skeered stiff yet. 
BEN ALLEN I'll tell you what, kids. There's always 

somethin' comin' to the guy that tries to put it over 

on the other guys all the time. 
DAVIS What kind of a ghost was it? 
BROWN It was a big ghost all dressed in white an' it had 

two eyes like two fires. 
RAY ALLEN Who told shu all about it, Brownie? Gee, 

but they must have been scared. 
BROWN You bet they were. They ran all the way home 

like mad men an' Pug ain't been the same all day. 

BEN ALLEN Serves 'em right. They ain't got no busi- 
ness tryin' to put over a low trick like they did on a 
new guy. 

DOLAN Das the truth. (Solemnly.) Whenever a guy 
tries to do somethin' mean he must expect to see a 
ghost. 

McCANN You bet your life. It's always the way, kids. 
When you do somethin' bad somethin' bad is done to 
you. Don't I know! Last week didn't my mother 
send me to the chicken coop to get some eggs an' 
didn't I shoot two chickens with my air-gun, an' 
didn't I bury 'em back o' the hedge. That night 
after I went to bed (solemnly) I bet youse fellas I 
saw fifty ghosts with big, long claws an' black wings. 
An' every ghost had a head like a chicken that was 
ten feet round. I thought I was standin' on a high 
hill that reached up near the clouds. The ghosts 
with the claws an' the chicken heads flew all 'round 
me. They came nearer an' nearer all the time, an' 
then when they were so near that I was sure they 
were goin' to peck my eyes, I jumped off o' the hill 
an' kep' fallin', fallin', fallin' 'till at last I hit the 
bed-post a kick an' skinned my toe. Then I saw my 
mother standin' over me. 'What's a matter?' she 
asked me. 'I seen ghosts,' I said. 'What ghosts?' 
'The ghosts o' the chickens,' I told her. 'What 
chickens?' 'The chickens I killed.' 'Did you kill 
chicken?' 'Yen, two chickens out near the coop when 
I went to get the eggs.' 'That's what always hap- 
pens when you kill chickens,' says Ma an' disap- 
peared. 

SPILLMAN Did she give you a lickin'? 



The Saving of Pug Halley 17 

McCANN Naw, Said I was punished enough in seem' the 

ghosts an' havin' my toe skinned. 
ROBINSON It serves a guy right to get a lickin' when he 

kills chickens. 
McCANN Aw, what's it to you? You ain't got nothin' to 

say 'bout it. 
ROBINSON Well, ain't you tellin' all the kids 'bout it, an' 

ain't I got a right to say somethin' if I want to. 
McCANN Naw you ain't. 
FEEHAN Quit crabbin', fellas; no use barkin'. Let's live 

in peace like the Catechism says. 
BROWN Yeh, das the idea. Let's love one another like 

the early Christians o' the Middle Ages. 
ANDERSON Middle Ages! Say, Kid, where do you get 

that stuff? Better look up your history. Whoever 

heard of early Christians o' the Middle Ages? 
BROWN Excuse me. I forgot. You see my memory is my 

great weakness. My head's like a Peerless, but my 

memory's like a Ford. 
MAGEE Naw, you just think your head's like a Peerless. 

It's just an ordinary every day truck-wagon. 
BEN ALLEN Yeh, das the truth, Brownie. Your head's 

a truck-wagon, very big an' full o' wheels. 
BROWN No, tain't big. 

BEN ALLEN Yes, siree. I'll measure an' prove it. (Snatch- 
es rope which he sees in the farm yard, makes loop 

and throws it over Brown's head.) Now, Brownie, 

I'm not only goin' to measure your head but your 

neck. I'll measure your neck first, 
FEEHAN (Jumping up.) We got Brownie, fellas. Let's 

hang him. (Boys jump up and circle round Ben 

Allen and Brown.) 
ANDERSON Let's hang him, Kids. 

MAGEE From a tree. (Boys jump around and laugh.) 
ROBINSON Naw, let's lynch him. 
DAVIS Well, ain't that the same thing? 
RAY ALLEN Naw tain't. 
DAVIS Why ain't it? 
RAY ALLEN 'Cause tain't. 

BEN ALLEN Never mind. We'll hang him an' lynch 
him afterwards. 

BROWN (In middle of the group of boys with the rope 
around his neck.) Aw, fellas, le' me go! 

ROBINSON No, siree, we're goiif to hung yon. 

BEN ALLEN An' after that we'll lynch yon. 

McCANN An' then you'll be drawed an' quartered. 

SPILLMAN An' next we'll burn you at the slake same a 
you was a witch. 



18 The Saving of Pug Halley 

BROWN Aw, fellas, I ain't done nothin\ 

(Several of the boys jump around crying "Let's hang 
him." "Let's lynch him." "Let's burn him." Shout- 
ing, cheering, laughter. Hodge, Jr. enters in the 
midst of the excitement and throws a sack of apples 
on the ground. Some of the apples fall out.) 

HODGE JR. (Shouts.) Help yourselves! 

(Boys let Brown go free. There is a wild scramble 
for the apples. Hodge Jr. goes out toward the end 
of the scramlbe. Mayhood rushes in excitedly.) 

MAYHOOD (Breathlessly.) O fellas, come on quick! Hal- 
ley's drowned! 

SEVERAL Drowned! 

MAYHOOD Yeh, we was boatin! in the river in Hodge's 
boat. The boat capsized an' he fell in. Wilson's 
lookin' for him. 

MAGEE Das awful. Let's go look for him, fellas. 

(Boys go out quickly. Ben Allen and Donlan remain 
behind.) 

BEN ALLEN Gee, das too bad about Pug. Hope they find 
him. He wasn't such a bad kid either. 

DONLAN Listen, Ben, I think I'll run an' get Gillman. 
You know he's a kid that knows a lot an' may be he 
can do somethin'. 

BEN ALLEN Das a good idea, kid. You go get him; an' 
say, I'll get Farmer's bicycle an' run for the doctor. 
(They both go out hurriedly. Farmer Hodge and 
Young Hodge enter after the stage has been vacant 
some moments.) 

FARMER HODGE Them boys be all gone I declare. 

HODGE JR. Yeh, Pa, an' they took the apples with 'em. 

FARMER HODGE I'll be bound they did. 

HODGE JR. Pa, listen. I want to ask you somethin'. 
Where did you go to school? 

FARMER HODGE AVhy, I went to a little schoolhouse 
that used to stand back there near where the old mill 
is. Sal Summer used to teach us, an' a mighty good 
teacher she was too. 

HODGE JR What did she teach you, Pa? 

FARMER HODGE Some readin', spellin' and figurin', not 
to mention writin'. 

HODGE JR. Didn't you have drawin', music, an' elocu- 
tion? 

FARMER HODGE Can't say we had. What is that elo- 
cution? 

HODGE JR. Why, Pa, you don' know nothin' if you don't 
know elocution. Gee, if you can't speak a piece you 
ain't no good at all. 

FARMER HODGE That so? Well, well. 

HODGE JR. Sure. Gee, you should hear me speak my 
piece! Bet you'd feel sorry that you hadn't 'locution. 

FARMER HODGE Go ahead, son, an' speak it. Only don't 
be too long for I've got to get the cows out o' the 
river pasture. 



The Saving of Pug Halley 19 

HODGE JR. All right, Pa. Now listen. (Takes off hat. 
Makes an awkward bow. Delivers some selection in 
a very crude, ridiculous fashion.) 

PARMER HODGE (After he is finished.) Ha! Ha! Ha! 
So that's what you call 'locution, is it? By glory, if 
you spoke like that out in the potato patch you'd 
frighten the potato bugs. (Laughs.) 

HODGE JR. (Showing displeasure.) Pa, I ain't goin' to 
speak no more pieces for you 'cause you're laffin' at 
me. 

PARMER HODGE (Laughing.) Whenever the bay mare 
gets balky in the corn-patch I'll send for you, son, an' 
have you speak that piece to her an' I bet you she'll 
get up. So that's 'locution is it? (Going out.) 
Ha, ha, ha. 

HODGE JR. (Sits down and begins to whittle.) Guess 
my Dad don't know nothin' about 'locution, that's 
why he laffed. 

(After some moments voices are heard outside.) Gee, 
whis! (looking out) there's the kids comin' up this 
way; an' they're carryin' somebody. (Enter boys 
bearing Halley.) 

DOLAN Gee, fellas, what'll we do? (Silence for some 
moments.) 

ROBINSON I think we'd better tell his father. 

SPILLMAN Yeh, but that'll take a long time. 

FEEHAN Who'll run an' tell him? (Silence.) 

HODGE JR. Guess I'd better call my Dad. Maybe he 
could do somethin'. 

BROWN Yeh, Hodgie, run an' get him quick. 

(Exit Hodge. Enter running Donlan and Gillman.) 

GILLMAN Move back, boys, an' let's get to work! 

ANDERSON Why he's dead ain't he? We can't do nothin'. 

GILLMAN Never mind talking. Step back. (Gillman ap- 
proaches body, tears open shirt collar and pulls off 
the coat. He directs the work of artificial respira- 
tion by moving the arm back and forth. He shows 
the boys what to do, and tells them when to relieve 
one another. Insert his directions like, "Keep it up." 
"Not quite so fast." "Your turn now/' "Hold the 
head a little higher," etc. Let the acting be nat- 
ural — just as if the boys were really trying to revive 
a companion. Though restoration often takes hours, 
five minutes will satisfy the requirements of a play.) 

MAGEE (Examining his face closely.) See, kids, there's 
color comin' into his face. 

GILLMAN Never mind. Keep on working! Your turn. 
Magee. 

DAVIS Look, kids; I think he's beginnin' to breathe. 

GILLMAN (Sternly.) Don't talk. Keep on with your work! 

McCANN Say, fellas, he's openin' his eyes. 

ROBINSON (Aside to Spill man. ) Honest ain't it like Our 
Lord raisin' the son o' the widow to life. 

SPILLMAN (Aside to Robinson.) Or like Lazarus, the 
man who was in the grave four days. 

GILLMAN Get in here. Brown, and work for a while. 
(Brown takes his turn,) Not too fast! 



20 The Saving of Pug Halley 

(Enter Dr. Bonner, Parmer Hodge, Hodge, Jr. and 
Ben Allen. Dr. Bonner bends down, feels Halley's 
pulse.) 

DR. BONNER He's coming all right. (After some min- 

utes.) Just lead him over to Mr. Hodge's so he may 
have a change and get warm. (Boys lead Halley 
out. Gillman, Donlan, and Ben Allen remain be- 
hind.) You boys showed very good sense in the way 
you treated that boy. 

DONLAN (Pointing to Gillman.) It was he did it, Doctor. 

DR. BONNER (Looking at Gillman.) Young man, your 
knowledge has saved a human life. (Dr Bonner 
goes out soliliquizing — "Let knowledge grow from 
more to more, But more of reverence in us dwell.") 

BEN ALLEN An' fellas, the Doctor doesn't know that 
Halley's the kind of guy to tie a kid with a rope for 
a whole night. 

DONLAN Ain't it the truth! 

GILLMAN Yes, but somebody came along and saved that 
boy just as samebody came along and saved Halley. 

DONLAN Dat so? Who? 

GILLMAN A ghost. 

BEN ALLEN 

DONLAN 

(Affecting surprise.) A ghost! 

GILLMAN Yes, a ghost. 

BEN ALLEN Moses! 

DONLAN Great Scott! 

GILLMAN No not Moses nor Scott either. This ghost has 
red hair and freckles and goes to St. Philip's School. 
And I think he's in the seventh grade. 

DONLAN (Looks at Ben Allen.) Can you beat it? 

BEN ALLEN (Looks at Donlan.) Gosh, ain't it the truth. 

DONLAN (Looks at Gillman.) I give up, kid. But just 
the same you're one good sport to treat Pug as you 
did after the way he treated you. 

(During all this conversation the twilight has been 
gathering. Now the figures of the three boys are 
just visible on the stage.) 

GILLMAN Say, boys, I have a holy picture in my prayer- 
book which has some words of Our Lord that I 
always remember. 

DONLAN What are they? 

GILLMAN "Love your enemies, do good to them that hate 

you. Judge not and you shall not be judged 

Condemn not and you shall not be condemned 

Forgive and you shall be forgiven." 
(Silence for a brief time.) 

DONLAN "Forgive an' you shall be forgiven." (Pause.) 
Say, Ben, I guess I won't punch Wilson's head like I 
promised. 

BEN ALLEN Huh, huh. An' I guess I won't lick May- 
hood. Tain't that I'm afraid to either. It's because 
— because — well, you know — "Forgive and you shall 
be forgiven." 

(SLOW CURTAIN.) 



Father Carroll's Other 
Boys' Play 

"The Ship in the Wake" 

Three Acts. Twenty-nine 
school boys in the cast. Sim- 
ple scenery. 

Played in one-hundred and 
six parochial schools. Highly 
recommended everywhere. 



Single Copy, 50 cents 



